Plonk Free Day – Success.

Coming soon to a park near you?

There were 10 arrests on Australia Day. But…
Three were for an unrelated punch up. Two were for drink driving. Three domestic violence matters. One shoplifter. And one assault.
Shoalhaven Local Area Commander Superintendent Wayne Starling went on the front foot this year and asked Council to extend alcohol bans to council parks and reserves.
The result was that Australia day was a huge success. Families could enjoy themselves.
It brought back memories of the time when the Nowra Show was made alcohol free.
Offensive behaviour charges dropped from double digits to zero or near.
It brought back memories as well of last year’s Australia Day where many areas had violent behavior, and assaults were commonplace.
It’s in Council’s hands now to see whether the alcohol free ban will continue, at least for those days when large crowds are expected.

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Ell's Bells

There is probably no more devoted fan of Mr. G.Ward than Mr. P. Ells.  Make a remark even vaguely contentious concerning Mr. G. Ward and there is Mr. P. Ells writing letters to the Register – which itself is a devoted fan of Mr. G.Ward.

A mild letter complaining about lack of consultation in relation to snoop cameras in Junction Street ended with the remark that the writer almost didn’t recognise Ward with his hat and sunnies. Like an Exocet missile back in comes a turgid hymn of praise of Mr. G. Ward which begins “IT IS with disgust and distain that I respond”

“Disgust and distain”? What aroused his disgust and distain apparently was the headline on the letter – but  that was put in by the Register.  Did he not know that?  Doesn’t the Register put headlines in Mr. P. Ells praisy prosy efforts? It seems he does not know this.

Mr. P. Ells is young. A Young Liberal in fact. He will surely apologise for such a misguided missive.  In fact,  I am sure that Mr. G. Ward will so instruct him.

Ell’s Bells

There is probably no more devoted fan of Mr. G.Ward than Mr. P. Ells.  Make a remark even vaguely contentious concerning Mr. G. Ward and there is Mr. P. Ells writing letters to the Register – which itself is a devoted fan of Mr. G.Ward.

A mild letter complaining about lack of consultation in relation to snoop cameras in Junction Street ended with the remark that the writer almost didn’t recognise Ward with his hat and sunnies. Like an Exocet missile back in comes a turgid hymn of praise of Mr. G. Ward which begins “IT IS with disgust and distain that I respond”

“Disgust and distain”? What aroused his disgust and distain apparently was the headline on the letter – but  that was put in by the Register.  Did he not know that?  Doesn’t the Register put headlines in Mr. P. Ells praisy prosy efforts? It seems he does not know this.

Mr. P. Ells is young. A Young Liberal in fact. He will surely apologise for such a misguided missive.  In fact,  I am sure that Mr. G. Ward will so instruct him.

How Green is Green?

Solar panels have been placed in the Mollymook Surf Club and Mayor Green could hardly contain himself praising himself and the Council for this wonderful action. Well, actually he could contain himself,  because nowhere in the media release was what it cost. A piece of economic  jiggerypokery?  Continue reading

School reports – be careful.

She's happy, local teachers are not saying.

Principals at Bomaderry High are wary of the school reports which report on schools.

Information about the school itself is desirable but parents should not go just to the new website, they say, but have a chat with the school itself.

Bomaderry High School deputy principal Jo Parsons and relieving deputy principal Mark Graham agree with this.

Full story here.

What a man!!

Juan Alvarez, 76, of Cambewarra was named as the Shoalhaven Citizen of the Year for 2010.

He formed the non-profit organisation Hands Across NSW Inc to help farmers battling with drought and has also been involved in fundraising for the NSW Freemasons, NSW Surf Lifesaving, swim classes in primary schools, Cambewarra Rural Fire Service, Shoalhaven Youth Orchestra and a day care medical centre in Narooma, Christmas hampers for Australian troops in East Timor, restoration of headstones at Kangaroo Valley Cemetery

FUNNEL WEBS

Good headline, that.  Right up there with “Hitler’s boyfriends” or “Bush fire danger.”

The good news is that there hasn’t been a funnel web death in nearly thirty years and the total number of recorded deaths is thirteen!

The bad news is that there are no real pictures of them. They are black or dark brown all over so there is very little differentiation in a photograph. Look for shininess.  Funnel web spiders tend to be glossy dark.

The other bit of bad news is that the males go courting in the warm months so that is when you will see one. That is what makes this story topical. Warm weather.

Its nest is the real giveaway. A neat hole in the ground where it is moisty. The neat hole has little silken tripwires around it which, when a cocky or something touches one, the spider is out like an exocet missile to have a word.

What to do if you see one? Kill it. The advantage is that you won’t have to read the next paragraph.

If it bites, kill it now for ident later. Press thumb against the wound. Immobilise the limb with splints. (No, there is no way to immobilise delicate body parts without losing a ‘family’ rating.” Get to hospital, quick smart.  Pressing the bite is like a kind of tournique, stopping the venom moving.

AT IT AGAIN!

AS if the $250 a day meal allowance and all the other perks were not enough, the notion has now been put out once again that Councillors on the Shoalhaven City Council should get paid as if they worked full time – and they are not asking for parity with the dole.

It seems they want wages in the vicinity of $8O,OOO a year, and more for Mayors.

Shaken but not stirred. Continue reading

NAKED TRUTH.

The news that a would-be terrorist bomber who only set fire to his delicate parts instead of sending two hundred innocent people to their death on a US airliner has had an immediate fallout.
Dim-witted Homeland Security Chief Janet Garofalo ordered that all passengers remain seated during the last hour of flight and have nothing on their laps. For good measure she saw that the terrorist’s visa was cancelled. Continue reading

TAKE THAT !!

Herr Wobbel (old photo).

A Stuttgart man, Heinrich Wobbel, has stunned neighbours with his efficient, no nonsense approach to vehicles speeding past his home every day. “It is not only dangerous,” the retired engineer said, “the noise is frightful and my wife cannot sleep in peace with all the racket.” Although the police are sympathetic they are questioning the legality of Wobbel’s invention and believe that, even if not actually illegal, it is certainly ruthless and may give Germany a bad name world wide. Wobbel is unimpressed by criticism, “Traffic is down to 5KPH and noise is below that of birdsong,” he said pugnaciously. “If more people did what I did, perhaps peoples’ rights may be more respected.” Hit Click to see the invention in operation.]

CLICK

New Logo Unveiled.

After years of planning and deliberation, Council has adopted its new logo.

The logo will go specifically to all ratepayers when rates are due, but the real thrust behind the logo is to deter development.

“Surely we have enough houses,” said Professor Testa Della Merda, Council Spin Doctor Public Relations head, “there has got to be an end to this insane build, build, build. We feel that the logo expresses Council’s attitude to development more clearly than reams of press releases.”

THINKS LINKS STINKS

Blemish and friend. (Blemish has a hat)

The Reverend Archibald Blemish of the New Reformed Reformed Church of Reformed Sinners has lashed out at suggestions that a Buddhist Temple will be constructed near Nowra.     Continue reading

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